Great call today. Nice to hear the stories in more depth from folks and I love Teresa's summary emails. Thanks for that.

I wanted to share a bit more about what I jumped in on at the end.

Since the last teleclass, Justin's post, and with further encouragement by Nathanael, I am increasingly using a practice when I find myself labeling a behavior or worse a person as a color.

I am using it as invitation to inquire 'how could they be being the other three colors'?

A simple example for me was in the gym 2 days ago I was on the treadmill with headphones on (listening Stagen) and an older white gentleman walked up to a young Asian kid riding a recumbent while on his phone but not speaking on it. There is a no cell phone use rule in our gym which I find generally means no talking on the phone (my story).

He approached him 2-3 times and pointed at the phone each time and had an authoritarian look on his face. I couldn't hear the content with my headphones on.  The last time he approached, he gently and assertively took his phone out of his hands and laid it on the gym floor out of reach. The kid made no move in the next 20 minutes to retrieve it even though I could see someone stepping on it.

My reaction was. 'What a dick!'  Older white guy asserting his dominance on a meeker Asian newbie to the gym. That guy is on a power trip. RED!

It then shifted into,
maybe the guy is a rule guy and thought the kid might have not known the rule. After asserting the rule he calmly asserted the rule and the kid complied without an issue. BLUE

I then shifted into, well maybe this guy was trying to be a challenger. The kid was new to the gym (based on what he was wearing and how he was interacting with the recumbent) and he felt the desire to challenge the kid to focus on his workout to maximize his results. ORANGE.

I then forcibly shifted into green and thought maybe the phone was playing something loudly and for the benefit of the folks around he was taking a stance for us all.

The most important take away I had is when I assumed 'DICK!' I failed to take in and give weight to the fact that the kid compiled and sustained his workout with his phone sitting right there in the path. I initially projected my own feelings of how I might feel. After going through the color wheel, I realized the facts actually suggested a story more closely to the facts that perhaps it was welcomed and appreciated and for all I know they are best buds or relatives.

So it's been useful to me of when I am applying (bordering judging) the mindset tool that I marry it with an opportunity to inquire into other possibilities.

-tony